Cruising Life Guilties

One of the harsh realities of the full-time cruising life is dealing with the guilt associated with not being around for family. Choosing an alternative lifestyle such as ours, seems like an easy course. Sail around the world. Experience new countries and cultures. Send postcards to family and e-mail greetings on birthdays and holidays. Post blogs and photos to let everyone know what we're doing.  But obviously, as we've traveled around the world over the past 15 years, we've escaped many of the day-to-day worries and trials concerning aging parents that our sibs have had to deal with. We've missed grandchildren's recitals and school plays. We've not had to deal with family matters or make some of the hard decisions that would have consumed much of our time had led a more traditional life. When something catastrophic happens, we do our best to get home when necessary. There's always a subtle feeling of resentment when we swoop in after a long absence and try to make things better. We overcompensate sometimes to make up for all the time away.

Some readers have commented that they enjoy reading about the real aspects of the cruising life, not just the fun parts. If you're thinking about the cruising life, this is something you should keep in mind. It's not always as easy as you might imagine to stay in touch and participate. It's hard to face the trips home when you're feeling like perhaps you should have stayed around in the first place to help, instead of being on a perpetual vacation.

We've known lots of cruisers who cruise half time and spend the other half at home to be with family. We've known others who have swallowed the anchor in favor of being closer to family full time.

Do we regret our cruising lifestyle? No. It's not that we don't love our family, we do. It's that we've chosen to enjoy our lives in a non-traditional manner which doesn't necessarily allow for lots of family time. Our family is so spread out over the USA … Las Vegas, Denver, Washington, DC, Boston … that even if we were resident in the USA, we probably would not spend as much time with all of them as we think we would.

Have we heard lots of complaints from them? No. After 15 years, our family is pretty much resigned to the fact that we're not around most of the time. There's much to be said for teleportation.

Beneath the Brown Cloud - LAX to Vegas

We could tell we were in Los Angeles as soon as we stepped out onto the curb at LAX. An ever-present brown haze hangs heavily over the city. Our eyes burned and we coughed and sniffled almost immediately. We anticipated that we'd be exhausted, so we'd planned to stop half way to Vegas and rest for the night. What should have been an easy two hour drive from the airport to Barstow during the middle of the afternoon, took over four hours because of heavy traffic and road construction. We fought to keep each other awake. We had the A/C on and the radio was blasting out familiar 1960s-1970s vintage singalong tunes.

We've driven this route several times in the past. Once we were out of the LA traffic (three of the four hours on the road), the drive became easier. The land was brown and parched, reflecting the severe ongoing drought in the area. Mesquite, sagebrush and yucca dotted the rolling hills with nary a wildflower around to provide even a tiny splash of color to brighten up the drab landscape.

We looked for certain landmarks along the way. Randy's giant donut

and Peggy Sue's 1950s diner.

The Direct TV blimp hovered lazily above us providing a short-term diversion. Move over Goodyear.

At last, the Route 66 sign in Barstow. We gratefully found our hotel, had a quick bite to eat and collapsed into a heap for a good night's sleep, only to wake at midnight ready to start a new day … unfortunately our internal clocks were set to Durban time.

After a restless night, we began the final two hour leg to Las Vegas. We traveled up into the foothills to an altitude of 4,700' and over the mountain pass. Crossing the California state border into Nevada is always a surprise. Primm, Nevada kind of sneaks up on you out of nowhere. The drab, brown landscape explodes into casinos and theme parks and hotels and outlet stores. Welcome to Nevada … which is anything but prim.

Then it was down, down, down as we made our descent into the Las Vegas valley. The brown cloud which had dissipated a bit as we drove further from LA, resumed its intensity as we neared Las Vegas.

A long, long trip home, but our family was waiting for us and the exhaustion of the trip soon melted away. Now if we can just get rid of the jetlag!

A Fresh Look at Durban

It's been very rainy in Durban the past couple of days. It rained all night before Brennan and Hannah arrived and it rained the day they arrived. In fact, it rained the day after they arrived. It made little difference, we were all off to a very slow start. Having just jet-lagged about a month ago, I empathized with their combined 23 hours of flight and layover time and the seven hour time difference. Slow starts were expected and just fine with us. After several cups of tea/coffee, lots of morning chat and some breakfast aboard Cups, the rain finally stopped and the sun even found its way into a blue sky by mid-afternoon.

We walked around Durban's streets, seeing it once again through fresh eyes as Brennan and Hannah asked questions and noted things we'd started taking for granted … street signs in three languages and ladies balancing large parcels on their heads and the hubbub and chatter on the city streets in so many languages and, of course, the number of black faces compared to our white faces … the smells, the sounds, the sights. TIA - This is Africa. How can you not love it?

We wandered through parks, up and down streets, into supermarkets and little shops, then made our way to Africa's oldest yacht club, the Royal Natal (founded 1858 … same wait persons on staff today) for lunch. With full bellies, we were back to roaming the streets. We'd planned to do more … stroll along the beaches or do a museum maybe? But after a visit to a local pub, we returned to Nine of Cups, tired, and still sated from our late lunch. We chatted about our plans for the next few days, packed for our upcoming trip and, after a few nightcaps, hit the sack early. We're off to Lesotho tomorrow!

Yes, of course, you're invited. Pack light, but bring some warm clothes. It's reportedly cold in the mountains.